Mistake

Copyright Lucy Drumonde 2011.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mistake

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mistake_(contract_law)

JOkes

Programming is like sex:

One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

Bad Mistake

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. "We went to look for it and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. "I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball -- stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake." "What did you do?" asks the doctor. "Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife,' Hey, this looks like yours!'"

Profitable Mistake

On his way out of church after mass, Frank stopped at the door to speak to the minister. “Would it be right,” he asked, “for a person to profit from the mistakes of another?”
“Absolutely not!” replied the pastor, disappointed that Frank would even ask such a question.

“In that case,” said the young man, “I wonder if you’d consider returning the hundred dollars I paid you to marry my wife and me last July.”

The Guardian Angel Mistake

A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near-death experience. During that experience she sees her guardian angel and asks if this is her time. The angel says no and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live.

Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital for a few more days and have a face lift, liposuction and a tummy tuck. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 or 40 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital.

She arrives in heaven again, sees her guardian angel and says, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years!!"
The angel replies, "Sorry. I didn't recognize you."

Courtesy of: http://www.jokebuddha.com,http://www.funnyhub.com,andhttp://www.jokesgallery.com

Thanks ... to all those who contributed all these these jokes, and for making the world a little better place by putting a smile on someones face:)

Surprise

Copyright Lucy Drumonde 2011.

             Don't you like suprises?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surprise
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surprise_(emotion)

Jokes

I had a dream the other night. I was in the old West riding in a stagecoach. Suddenly, a man riding a horse pulls up to the left side of the stagecoach, and a riderless horse pulls up on the right.


The man leans down, pulls open the door, and jumps off his horse into the stagecoach. Then he opens the door on the other side and jumps onto the other horse.

Just before he rode off, I yelled out,

"What was all that about?"

He replied,

"Nothing. It's just a stage I'm going through."



Surprise The Wife


After a few years of married life, this guy finds that he is unable to get it up anymore. He goes to his doctor, his doctor tries a few things but nothing works.

Finally the doctor says to him this is all in your mind, and refers him to a psychiatrist.

After a few visits to the shrink, the shrink confesses I am at a loss as to how you could possibly be cured.

Finally the psychiatrist refers him to a witch doctor.

The witch doctor tells him, I can cure this, and throws some powder on a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke....

The witch doctor says This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year All you have to do is say 1 2 3 and it shall rise for as long as you wish

The guy then asks the witch doctor What happens after when its over?.

The witch doctor says all you have to say is 1 2 3 4 and it will go down. But be warned it will not work again for 3 months

This guy goes home and that night is ready to surprise his wife with the good news... So he is lying in bed with her and says 1 2 3, and suddenly he gets a hard-on.

His wife turns over and says What did you say 1 2 3 for ?

Courtesy  of A-Ha and Buddy Joke.

A Day in the life of a mind.