Bull

Copyright Lucy Drumonde 2012

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bull

JOkes

Classic Bull Joke 

A young man stopped at a local restaurant after a day of roaming around in Mexico.

While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious-looking platter being served at the next table.

It looked good.

It smelled good.

He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"

The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!"

The visitor, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the heck, I'm on holiday down here! Bring me an order!"

The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy!"

The next morning, the man returned, placed his order, and then that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day.

After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday!"

The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si, Senor. Sometimes the bull wins."

What do you get if you cross your missus with a pit bull?
What do you get if you cross your missus with a pit bull?Your very last head job.
A young man was staying on a farm with his uncle and aunt...

A young man was staying on a farm with his uncle and aunt for the summer. One morning the aunt and uncle walked in the kitchen and the young man was drinking an extremely large glass of milk. The young man said "I took the liberty of milking your cow this morning!" He then continues and says "it took me a while to get her started up. She must be old and stubbly." The uncle says with a confused look " Um son we don't have a cow...
We have a bull!"

The 2 moose hunters...

These two hunters went moose hunting every year without success.Finally they came up with a foolproof plan. (emphasis on fool)They got themselves a very authentic cow moose costume and learned the mating call of a cow moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure in the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot the bull.So, they set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, in their costume, and began to give the moose love call. Before too long their call was answered by bull in the forest.They called again, the bull answered closer to them. They called again, The bull answered, and came crashing out of the forest and into the clearing. As the bulls' pounding hoof beats got closer the guy in front said, "OK, lets get out and get him"!After a moment, that seemed like an eternity, the guy in the back shouts -"THE ZIPPER IS STUCK, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!?!"The front guy says, "Well, I'm gonna start nibbling grass,but you better start to "brace yourself!"

Turkey and the Bull...

Chatting with a bull, a turkey sighed and said, "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree, but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.The next day, after eating some more dung, the turkey reached the second branch. Finally, after a week, there he was, proudly perched at the top of the tree.Soon, though, the turkey was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey from the tree.Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there!

Courtesy of: http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/WorldsFunniestJoke andhttp://jokes.contentavailable.com/p/old_bull

Thanks...to all those who contributed all these these jokes, and for making the world a little better place by putting a smile on someones face:)